I developed a method for coaching abrasive leaders (bosses who engage in bullying behaviors) and subsequently founded The Boss Whispering Institute (www.bosswhispering.com) to share the method with other coaches. I found Winnicott's concept of the "good enough mother" to be pivotal in working with this population, as so often, they are driven to be perfect because of internalized parental voices that demanded this. To help them see that it is good enough to be good enough has been important. In the course of coaching, clients will so often reflect: "I realize now that I don't have to be perfect." My response: "Welcome to the human race." Thank you for your wonderful article, Isobel.
I developed a method for coaching abrasive leaders (bosses who engage in bullying behaviors) and subsequently founded The Boss Whispering Institute (www.bosswhispering.com) to share the method with other coaches. I found Winnicott's concept of the "good enough mother" to be pivotal in working with this population, as so often, they are driven to be perfect because of internalized parental voices that demanded this. To help them see that it is good enough to be good enough has been important. In the course of coaching, clients will so often reflect: "I realize now that I don't have to be perfect." My response: "Welcome to the human race." Thank you for your wonderful article, Isobel.
Fantastic letter! Thank you and a very good reminder of the way we should approach coaching school leaders!
A lot covered here but my takeaway is that there is more to support than relationships and there is more to relationships than support.